Thursday, July 08, 2004

I Discover My Love For Michael Moore

In an effort to balance out all the gleeful Moore hatred of recent, I've been trying to find something good to say about him and his work. I was coming up empty for a while, but after listening to people in the dining room extol the man and movie's virtues, I figured out something the fat tub of mendacity is good for: he's the ultimate idiot barometer.

All those people calling the movie "awesome"... well, I always suspected they were idiots not worthy of paying attention to, but I didn't want to absolutely conclude as much without more conclusive evidence, and finding out that kind of stuff on my own would've been a bigass hassle. Now I know for sure.

It's like I have a little clipboard with two boxes: "Idiot" and "Not an Idiot." Anyone who thinks Michael Moore is the bees knees of political discourse, or that F-9/11 is a devastating takedown of Bush or the war just proudly made their mark in the idiot box, and I can proceed to completely disregard their opinion on anything even remotely related to politics.

So thank you, Michael Moore, diviner of morons, revealer of dumbasses, all-powerful labeler of shit-for-brainers, you've done your country a great service.